Some pain is long term sorrow, but then there is pain that comes out of nowhere and hits hard. Yesterday I could not move, feel or think. I snacked and then lay down and dozed. I had been blindsided. This has brought me to four questions:
- Is God sovereign? If yes then,
- Is God all powerful? If yes, then,
- Is God good? If yes, then,
- Is God good to me? Ah, that is the sticker, upfront and personal.
If God is sovereign, all powerful and good, then I can give thanks because I know that my good God is in control--of everything. He can bring “beauty out of ashes.” I can trust Him even in the midst of disbelief and anguish. As I ponder these things emotions, simple grief begins to flow instead of the mind numbing complication that is added when I know that I am not in control and believe that God is uncaring and distant. God is good all the time; all the time God is good!
My dear Papa, It has been a hard two days. It still does not make sense to me; I still hurt, but I know who You are and so I can live out this day with hope in my heart. It is truly, “well with my soul.”